February 2012
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January 2012
72 posts
Derren Brown - "If I were PM"
Q: How would you redecorate No 10?
A: I’m thinking something like the Addams Family mansion. And I’d swap the policeman at the door for a guy with a hunchback.
Q: Who would be your Alastair Campbell?
A: Don’t know. I’d have to have Stephen Fry in there somewhere.
Q: Who would be in your cabinet?
A: All of the X-Men.
Q: How would you respond to being booed in public?
A: I’d respond by sobbing and getting very defensive.
Q: How would you deal with a sex scandal in the cabinet?
A: With a huge party. It sounds very exciting.
Q: How would you greet the Queen?
A: By grinning inanely and talking bollocks, which is generally what I do when meeting people of great authority.
Q: Would you make Scotland independent?
A: It would be rude not to if that was what Scotland wanted.
Q: Which pets would you get for No 10?
A: Lions and tigers. It would be amazing.
Q: How would you see off a younger, better-looking political rival?
A: I’d make his head explode. Or if he was a lot younger and a lot better-looking, I might consistently flirt with him until he was forced to give up politics.
Q: How would you increase participation in politics?
A: Nude dancing.
Q: What legacy would you like to leave?
A: I think it would be best for everyone to forget about it as soon as possible.
Urban Dictionary definition of Derren Brown:
cakesandsnouts:
vicivefallen:
Patron saint of corduroy and Frock Coats.
Hobbies included scaring the crap out of students and making Stephen Fry say ‘Fuck’ loudly.
THAT FUCKING GIF! ^
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aquaxkitty asked: Thank you for following me! :O Your blog is a lovely source of daily Derren goodness! Hooray!
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Learn't some new card tricks XD
Can’t wait to show my friends tomorrow at school. so they can tut and tell me to fuck off.
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carrierosemorr asked: haha thanks for the follow :) That wasn't meant to be a sob story by the way! I respect you for having an obsession with Derren Brown, he's a beautiful man.
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Just been told that I come across as being a bit...
georgiiiaaa:
“(Phone rings in the audience) …Whose phone’s that? …Whose phone is that?! …Don’t...”
– Derren Brown (via shityeahh)
loisthejellyfish asked: No I didn't meet him. I was too scared to try even though I know he'd be really nice and everything :S Plus my dad wanted to go home. One of these days I will be brave enough to meet him though! Are you planning on meeting him? If you are, are you going to touch his beard? Hehehe please do!
thewinchesterboys asked: Omc... I love your blog... I don't think I'll leave it... No I won't.... But from where is the mini ovenmits from? I haven't seen that! :o
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thehomeofwittybanter asked: Do I follow your other blog? Not sure if I do. Anyway hi and perfect URL.